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  • This is the official discussion thread for Blaze of Glory, a series made by Ultra3000, collaborating with Aaronbill3.

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    • Okay, so let's get things started. I'll lay down the basics once more:

      Synopsis: A Pyronite crash lands on a distant planet during a meteor shower, said planet is full of exiled members of various alien species, ruled by an oppressive dictatorship. Pyronite gets captured, forced to participate in gladiatorial matches, where he is given the name Fireborn (since he suffers from amnesia). His goal is to make the best of his current situation, learn about his past and maybe make the world he's stranded on a better place.

      Fireborn: He's a very determined fighter, initially only cares about his survival, eventually learns that teamwork will take him far longer than playing the lone wolf act. Can adapt quickly to difficult situations, making up plans on the spot. His amnesia troubles him, since he has a bad feeling his past holds something sinister. He is somehow unable to properly sustain himself during flight (perhaps due injuries caused by the crash landing), can only use limited terrakinesis to move quickly around.

      Rainox: A purple male Galvanic Mechamorph, Rainox is the first ally Fireborn makes and though they sometimes don't see eye to eye, they have a great bond. The thing is, Rainox loathes technology, which means he doesn't really use his upgrading abilities, instead relying on "primitive weaponry" and the occasional optic laser. However, when the situation calls, he is truly a sight to behold. Rainox had left Galvan B for a tech-free world, but got intercepted while passing by the planet.

      Astrapia: A female Amperi, Astrapia is emotionally distant, mostly keeping to herself, preferring solitude instead. However, this is a mere façade for a past incident which haunts her to this very day. When the situation calls, Astrapia proves to be incredibly loyal and willing to protect those she cares about.

      Mk'dly Necrofriggian (Name Undecided): Initially Fireborn's greatest rival in the arena, the Necrofriggian is a deadpan starker, with his cold insults being almost as great as his fighting skills. Eventually he mellows out somewhat, with both he and Fireborn often teaming up against common threats. Being on the planet longer than most, he is quite knowledgeable about the terrain and folklore of the place.

      Female Galilean (Name Undecided): The epitome of gentle giantess, this Galilean detests fighting, with her using her gravity powers to keep an opponent "glued" on the ground until he gives up. Naturally, her reputation is not the best and the only reason she hasn't been "disqualified" from the games is because nobody can pierce through her gravitational fields, so they just let her be for the most part.

      Things to work on: The planet's name and most importantly the villains. I want the dominant race to be a new alien species, but I have trouble coming up with something good. Once this gets flashed out, focusing on the main villain (the Dictator, not actual name or title btw) is the next priority.

      So, what do you think of the main cast so far? Any help regarding the planet and maybe some lore behind it would be appreciated. If you have any other ideas, hit me up.

      NOTE: I might be unable to come on chat for the remainder of the day, but will be relatively free tomorrow afternoon. Let me know how things are on your end.

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    • CaT linked me to this wiki so I can read the thread.

      By 'new species' I'm guessing that excludes us from using AAA aliens?

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    • Well, tbh, I think having our own aliens represented in BoG is a pretty neat idea, even if some of them are simply background cameos. Now, when I say the dominant species, that doesn't mean they have to be indigenous to the planet. We could imagine it as a very powerful, independent colony that got there before anyone else and developed into what it is currently. So...we could use one of the AAA aliens, even for dominant species candidates. I'll let you suggest which one you think is most fitting for the position, since you actually made them and all.

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    • As for AAA candidates...

      • Necroterrans are an inherently evil species, feeding off of life force. But they only evolved as recently as the extinction of the Vladats, so they wouldn't fit the 'ancient race' idea.
      • Ramiel Monoliths are a race I'm not that proud of. But they are quite strong and ancient, and are very much an aggressive, hateful, war-filled species despite their simple appearance.
      • I have an idea for another species that is quite powerful, able to generate strong and dangerous illusions. They are like ghosts themselves, and ultimately fairly fragile, but their powers make them fierce and terrifying opponents.
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    • Updating with info discussed yesterday:

      The Necrofriggian is officially named Korisan and the female Galilean is Stellar.

      The planet is called Numeria, located deep inside the T'zeen Nebula, which means that the dominant species on the planet are none other than T'zun Armies. This iteration is slightly different from the AAA incarnation originally envisioned, mostly because they have taken countermeasures to reduce some of their most glaring weaknesses, like extreme heat, for obvious plot reasons. Their leader is Tidas, a rusty orange, jagged, vicious looking T'zun Army, who also wears a suit that absorbs external moisture to boost his powers. On another note, Erodinians and an as of yet unnamed magma based species reside on Numeria, having allied themselves with the T'zun Armies.

      Major plot point: It turns out that local folklore had predicted the arrival of a "Fallen Star" landing on Numeria, around the same time Fireborn arrives and it is said that he will bring great change to that world. However, scholars have interpreted this story divisively: One group states that the figure is supposed to bring "rebirth, like a Phoenix rising from the ashes", while others claim that he will bring a "razing catastrophe, a rampaging inferno that will consume everything on its path".

      This story gives a reason for characters to ally/antagonize Fireborn, depending on which version of the tale they believe. Naturally, the rulers will try to push the latter theory forward.

      I've come up with a few other details after leaving chat:

      Fireborn tends to refer to everyone with shortened versions of their names. Hence, Rainox is Rai, Korisan is Kori, Astrapia is Astra and Stellar is Stel.

      Korisan refers to Fireborn as "Matchstick" and "Fallen Star" mockingly.

      In order for the gladiators to be restrained, they have been outfitted with obedience disks, each serving a different purpose. Fireborn has one that will cause his inner magma body to cool off extremely, leaving him a living statue. Rainox doesn't have a disk, but rather an inert electromagnet implant, Korisan has the standard shocking variant every time he tries to turn intangible, Astrapia has something similar to Aggreggor's power dampeners and Stellar doesn't have one, because 1) No one can approach her 2) They have this "If you're cool, we cool, aight fam" attitude going on.

      So, that's all for now, hoping to get on chat later during the day.

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    • Sorry, had to leave chat for today. Talk to you soon (also good luck with the DoB10 episode).

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    • thanks mang

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    • Oh and a heads up in case I forget to say next time we speak, Ulti wants to speak with you.

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    • So, I came up with the plot of the entire first episode, so here it goes (keep in mind it is still subject to change and it all depends on your feedback as well).

      T'zun Army and Erodinian children are playing "mudball". The ball gets lost in the nearby forest and a T'zun Army kid goes to retrieve it. A massive meteor shower occurs, ravaging parts of the forest. With the local authorities quickly alerted, the T'zun Army kid, unscathed but overcome by curiosity, approaches the crash site. The smell of molten rock and metal overwhelms him and loses consciousness. Fireborn regains consciousness, appearing bewildered by his surroundings. The authorities show up at the scene and erroneously believing Fireborn attacked the child, assault him. He tried to fight back, but is too weak from the crash and is easily subdued.

      Exiting the forest, the authorities are approached by members of Tidas' Elite Guard, who inform them that they've got this and that they hand over Fireborn, which they begrudgingly agree to do so.

      The sequence that follows is a long nightmare by Fireborn, with a voice echoing: "Don't stop. You can't stop. Only the strongest may survive. Evolve or die."

      Fireborn is woken up by Rainox, with whom he shares the prison cell. After a brief confrontation and a failed attempt by Fireborn to escape, Rainox explains as best as his can about the current situation and states that Fireborn is next in line for the gladiator match scheduled this evening.

      Meanwhile, news about the meteor shower have spread like wildfire to the capital, with a member of a Tidas' elite guard running toward the capitol building to inform Tidas personally. While initially appearing uninterested, upon learning that the new gladiator is a Pyronite, he states that he will personally attend this evening's match.

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    • Fireborn prepares for the match, choosing weaponry and such, when he is confronted by Korisan, exchanging snide remarks with one another, although they are stopped by Stellar before they start a full on fight.

      The next segment alternates between two scenes: the gladiator ring and the prison, were prisoners are escorted to a heavily supervised room, where they are allowed to view the match in full. Fireborn's first match is against a smug Conductoid, boasting about his unmatched strength, but is knocked out with a single uppercut to the jaw. His second match is against Stellar; she pins him down with her gravity powers and his fire projectiles are completely ineffective against her. However, she says that she detests fighting and proposes a compromise: She will let Fireborn "defeat" her, on the condition that he helps set the other prisoners free as well. Fireborn quickly agrees and the "plan" proceeds undisturbed. For his third and final match, Fireborn has to face a Crabdozer. After a long and grueling fight, with Fireborn getting his left arm crushed between the Crabdozer's jaws, he melts the floor of the arena, trapping the Crabdozer, then jams an energy staff in one of its vulnerable eyes, frying its brain. After a short period of silence, the crowd roars in excitement, chanting Fireborn's name. However, he loudly states that he demands to be let free. Tidas says that he will; provided he defeats him in combat. Tidas enters the ring and quickly overpowers Fireborn, who is too weak and injured to put up a fair fight. However, he still stands and even manages to breach Tidas' moisture suit, which sends him into a frenzy, ordering his elite guard to subdue Fireborn, while he cowardly retreats from the battle.

      The ending scene shows Fireborn recuperating in the med bay, visited by Rainox and Stellar. Rainox claims that Fireborn had done the impossible, wounding Tidas' pride and therefore will stand with him to the very end. Stellar asks if he meant what he said in the arena. Fireborn truthfully answers that he initially considered not following up on his promise, however the current situation is oddly familiar to him and is very confused about his past and he doesn't want to face this alone. A prison staff member enters the room, dropping by a package, confusing Rainox and Stellar, but not Fireborn, who gets up and approaches it. He states that if they are going to stand up against Tidas, the three of them won't be enough and will require the help of others. He is not sure why he is doing this exactly: Whether to right a wrong, out of satisfaction or for fame...or glory. As he suits up with the Crabdozer armor, he stands determined, with the screen slowly fading to only showing the signature Pyronite face, before becoming engulfed by flames. Roll credits.

      So, what did you think? Your input is massively appreciated in this. Until next time.

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    • First of all T'zun Army are made mostly of water, I don't think they can smell. Just in case anyone else thinks that way, we might as well have it be an Erodinian kid that gets knocked out by fumes, given that they have some organic components to them. This feels like a hell of a lot of content for one episode though. Maybe it would work better as a two-parter?

      Also not much of a fan of dream sequences myself. They always feel like a deus ex machina or a cop-out. 

      Good idea with the conductoid fight. I was thinking of maybe using Feedback v Apollo at one point but it seemed way to one-sided against Ben. Finally, a species Feedback can't beat!

      As for Stellar's fight... It feels a little forced for her to already be placing such a burden on Fireborn.

      • She's under the assumption Fireborn wants to leave
      • She's under the assumption that Fireborn was already planning to escape at some point.
      • Surely all of this is in plain sight? For a being as big as her, it'd be kind of hard for them to formulate such a plan without the audience noticing.
      Tidas enters the ring and quickly overpowers Fireborn, who is too weak and injured to put up a fair fight. 
      

      fair enough, he has just fought three opponents (a bit too much for his first appearance in an arena tbh. gladiator matches are akin to modern day wrestling. People are there for a show, not for bloodshed. What would happen if Fireborn was killed in the first match?)

      However, he still stands and even manages to breach Tidas' moisture suit [...] Tidas cowardly retreats from the battle.
      

      Okay maybe the moisture suit is fragile, or is damaged by fire/heat easily, but if Fireborn is weakened as you say then Tidas should be able to floor him easily even without the moisture suit. Pyronites are somewhat vulnerable to water, remember. I picture that if Fireborn could even damage the suit, it'd be only with him putting in all of his effort due to the previous fights draining him.

      The logic behind the last scene confuses me somewhat. Our heroes are in the med bay, sure. But why were they allowed to freely go there? Aren't they still prisoners? Isn't their movement around the prison restricted? And why are they seemingly alone to the point of being able to receive anonymous gifts? (I assume from the friendly guard.)

      I do like the idea of Fireborn being given the armour outright. What I interpreted this as meaning (idk whether you came to the same conclusion) was that the gladiators could receive gifts from sponsors, that they are allowed to keep (somewhere that they cannot use them to break out) and bring into future matches. This allows the better showmen to get the edge over stronger opponents, and feeds into the idea that gladiators are there to entertain.

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    • Alrighty, glad you liked it for the most part!

      • A two-parter works great upon recondsidering, I think the point where I split the two posts above is where the two eps are separated as well.
      • Having an Erodinian instead of a T'zun Army is perfectly fine by me and makes more sense as you say.
      • We could drop the dream sequence, yeah, also leaving things more vague at the beginning is a good thing.
      • As for the Stellar fight, do keep in mind she was present when Fireborn and Korisan have a verbal conflinct (after all, she was a contenstant at that match, even if she didn't choose weaponry at the end), so she definitely heard Fireborn's intentions of getting free loud and clear. As for your third point, I thought of that problem myself and here's how I envision the fight: Fireborn keeps getting repelled by Stellar's gravitational waves, but every time he gets closer, she whispers to him bits of the plan. Of course, Galileans have a mouth even Gourmands would envy, so the whole whispering thing might be a little difficult, but I think it works.
      • Fireborn was definitely weakened, guy had a broken arm and was completely exhausted.
      • Tidas wasn't really hurt by the breach in the containment and would have indeed completely floored Fireborn on his own, but his ego is so massive that the very thought that Fireborn managed to land a hit of him (which happened like you said, pouring all his strength at that shot) utterly repulses him, which is why he backed away. In the end, only his pride was shattered, not him physically.
      • As for the visitor thing, my bad, should have clarified further: Gladiators who are recuperating are allowed up to two visitors at the time and each visits last about 5 minutes, with guards standing right outside the room. Also, each prisoner is outfitted with the obedience disks (Rainox has the electromagnet, but same principle) and guards have a tracker remote which blinks when a prisoner is doing something suspicious, so they can restrain them almost instantaneously. Also, the friendly guard paid the other guards to mind their own business so that the package is delivered personally to Fireborn.
      • Oh yeah, that's exactly what I was thinking. When I did a search on gladiators and stuff, I was surprised by how much they had in common with modern fighters. Some of them even had merchandise (does that mean that aspect of Disney's Hercules is accurate then?!).
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    • I did not know that gladiators had merchandise, that is pretty funny. Honestly most of what I know about gladiators comes from what little I remember of Horrible Histories and watching ManyATrueNerd play through Ryse: Son of Rome (a game he tore to shreds for historical inaccuracy).

      So wounding Tidas' pride causes a 'flight' reaction? Considering the series would be leading up to a confrontation against him, I feel like a 'fight' response may be more intimidating; allowing us to see what Tidas is like when he does not hold back. Even if this injures Tidas further, that leaves room for him to grow stronger as well. Kind of like how Krillin managed to cut off Freeza's tail in DBZ. In some strange way it adds tension by proving that the fight is not entirely futile.

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    • I've come up with a few small details concerning the pilot:

      • Rainox mentions to Fireborn that his previous cellmate was a Vaxasaurian, describing him as "very gruff and tough guy-acting attitude, had a tendency to shout out his name as a victory cry I suppose (really annoying if you ask me) and to top it off, he always picked the upper bed (it was a bunk bed) so I had to live in fear I would end up like the Polymorph guy three cells to the right." When Fireborn asks what happened to him, Rainox rather casually mentions he was eaten by a Tyrannopede in the arena.
      • You may have noticed that one of the main cast, Astrapia, does not feature prominently in the first episode. To clarify, she does appear in the scene where prisoners are to be escorted to the room where they can watch the match, but she replies "Not interested." to the guards and retreats back to her cell (she is not named in the scene either).
      • The arena fights have a robot announcer, who is none other than...Slix Zegma. (Who?) Well, he is a robot from the same production line as Slix Vigma and is like that cousin you only ever see at family meetings.

      I've also thought up two new supporting characters:

      • Vril: An elderly Cerebrocrustacean, Vril is friends with Rainox (they were on opposite cells back in the day). He knows the gladiator schedule like the back of his pincer and in fact makes a short cameo (voice only) in the pilot to confirm Rainox's claims that Fireborn is next in line for the match. While possessing the impressive Cerebrocrustacean intellect, Vril's advanced age has caused him to develop a few quirks, such as randomly sprouting trivia about irrelevant stuff, all in the loquacious manner used by Cerebrocrustaceans. You never know when one of his pieces of trivia might prove useful, however...
      • Female Thep Khufan: Okay, so I haven't actually developed this character yet. All I know is that I want an Anur System representative and to be a Theo Khufan (A little help?)


      On another note, I haven't had the chance to talk about DoB10:

      Finally read the ep. RIP Mad Ben (though if Apollo had said something among the lines of "I'm afraid his performance was rather...MEDIOCRE." that would have been pure gold, just my two cents though).

      Snare-Chill is slick as hell boi (also, Snare-oh is not mentioned in the Aliens Used section, just a heads up).

      The alternate Apollos were pretty cool. I may be grasping at straws, but I couldn't help but feel there were DBZ references (the blue Apollos being SSB form, Metal Apollo being Metal Cooler and also SSJ3 Apollo).

      Excited for round 2 of Prime v Apollo, should be quite interesting.

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    • Responding to your latest reply which somehow appeared one hour later:

      The reason that Tidas reacted that way is because, this was a new experience for him imo. He is used to being top dog and dominating everyone either through sheer strength or by commanding his forces. The fact that someone, even marginally, managed to lay a hit on him, to stand up to him in any degree, is completely alien to him. Of course, I wouldn't want the villain to be seen only as an ego obsessed coward, who relies on his army to be on top. This incident just gave him a very hard and useful lesson. For all his power, sometimes it is not enough. So, he will push himself to the limits, becoming even stronger, until Fireborn regrets ever facing him. So yeah, we will see Tidas cut loose and it will be glorious.

      Thank you for reminding me Krillin's most epic moment in DBZ, too bad he really fell of the radar afterwards (in DBS he is truly pathetic, but vows to retrain to get stronger.) Here's hoping.

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    • Okay, here are some things I'd like to discuss:

      Locations:

      • The Capital City (how about Lemunor?): I imagine it as a coastal city (duh), perhaps partially submerged like Venice, with lots of water canals running through the landscape. Many buildings follow the iceberg logic: most are only one story high above the surface, but have several more under the sea. This is especially true for the Capitol building, which is like a reverse skyscraper in height (or in this case, depth). Hydroelectric plants are in effect, providing most of the power. Banners of Tidas' Regime are spread through the city, endorsing their leader. A section of the city nicknamed "The Sand Box" allows Erodinians to live close to the main city and conduct their business. There is a lush green forest behind the city (the one ravaged by the meteor shower) and even further back a large volcano, where the magma based species reside (I can only assume about this part, is this okay with your headcanon?).
      • The Prison-Gladiator Arena: I imagine this as a joint location. The Prison is located a few miles off the coast of Lumenor, which should make it even harder for non-flying and non-swimming species to escape. It is quite a vast complex, able to hold approximately 10,000 prisoners at a time. Most guards are of the magma species, though I could see T'zun Army and Erodinian guards there as well. Maybe even robotic guards for dangerous inmates. The prison is connected to the arena with a large tube that goes completely underwater. The arena is quite a bit more than just that; for one it has several training rooms and even temporary sleeping rooms. The arena is able to hold about 50K people at a time and reservations are booked at least a week before the match. The arena is equipped with holographic screens that display things such as sponsor endorsements, fun trivia and the occasional praise Tidas banner. The games can be watched at home, but only if you are willing to pay a rather extravagant subscription pack.
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    • Time and Measures:

      This might seem a bit overkill, however in order to make the series more authentic, I propose making up ways the people of Numeria measure time and other things:

      • Time (in relation to days, hours, minutes): Obviously, people of Numeria would not use the current Earthling system. My idea for this is rather simple: Periods of the day are divided based on the tides. Depending on whether we have a flood tide, high tide, ebb tide or low tide. This behavior on Earth is semi-diurnal and the same behavior could also exist in Numeria. This also conveniently divides the day into four large periods (Like we have morning, noon, evening and night).
      • Time (in relation to years, months): The designation for years is again simple: Like we use BCE or AD, or other fictional franchises like Star Wars use BBY and ABY, the designation for years centers around a pivotal event, with events transpiring before or after the event designated as such. I imagine this pivotal event to be the rise of the first T'zun Army Emperor Tritonius, which occurred 705 years ago. This would make the current year 705 AT (After Tritonius). Months are a trickier matter, one which I have yet to resolve.
      • Currency: I want to avoid the use of Tayden (since there is zero Taydenite in Numeria), so I thought using something akin to pearls to measure value is the way to go.
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    • h-h-holy crap I missed a lot being gone for a day

      response to you first message:

      • Maybe a masochistic Thep Khufan? Like she enjoys ensnaring people in her binds, then constricting them until they submit. Also (I don't know if it still says this) the BTP Snare-oh page said that he had hidden powers we do not know about yet. My headcanon is that if they ensnare someone then place their own crown-like head over the head of the victim it puts them under the control of the Thep Khufan? or if this happens but the Khufan lets the victim retain control their powers get enhanced? idk, this is just some idea throwing.
      • The Cereberocrustacean may be difficult to write without it becoming obvious that what he says has meaning. SU ran into this problem with a character called Ronaldo. Everything that character said has come true and now people know to listen to him.
      • that Mad Max reference. Dammit. You're better at writing DoB10 than I am >:( Anyway what Apollo says IS a reference but I'd rather talk about it in PM and away from prying eyes.
      • thanks for the heads up, fixed now
      • You successfully identified Ultimate Apollo out of the gang there. The line up wasn't meant to be a DBZ reference but now I can't unsee that.

      Nothing to really add to the second message

      Third message:

      • The Magma species could live anywhere the Erodinians can, as well as inside volcanoes if they wish, so yeah the volcano is alright by me.
      • A slight problem with the city layout is, to me, the amount of water. Sure the T'zun Army would want an abundance of it, but if Erodinians and Magma Species live there then that water is highly dangerous to them. Maybe the city has a lot of viaducts and less of it is submerged Also consider that the more of the city that is underwater is more area that out protagonists can't really fight in or visit.
      • The Gladiator arena sounds good.

      Fourth message:

      • I feel like the tide system would be a more informal way of counting times of day (like dawn, dusk, or evening.)
      • A more formal way of couting small amounts of time could just be a fictional name. I'm thinking something like the Daleks from the American Movies. They had a 'rel' system whereby 50 of them went into a minute, after which their system was basically identical to human systems.
      • The year system sounds good
      • I'm not sure about using pearls, but I agree with using your own currency system.
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    • Tidas
      Whipped up some artwork for Tidas. It isn't like a proper image for him, just something I did at midnight for the fun of it. thoughts?
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    • That's a pretty lit design fam. The moisture suit is pretty much exactly how I envisioned it, the stripes on his body are neat (I assume they are concentrated minerals flowing in his body?) and the way his head spikes elongate make them resemble a crown, which is quite fitting imo. Not sure if that was your intention, but it's a great design overall (Does that mean you will do complete art for him as well?)

      Updating with stuff discussed on chat yesterday:

      • Not sure if we agreed on having the currency being cubes named kobiks but I'll leave it here just in case.
      • The sadistic Theo Khufan idea has been approved and she has the ability to control the will of others by placing her headdress/crown on their head. As for her name, I went with Sadocris, a portmanteau of sadistic and Nitocris, a female Egyptian Pharaoh who avenged her brother's murder by flooding a chamber where his murderers have gathered for a ceremony hosted by her (Gee, I wonder if part of this backstory could have further uses...) (Also, you've gotta admit Nitocris is a pretty awesome name).
      • We have a new supporting character: Mell-Kith the Ring Master, a Dactylidian. Mell-Kith claims his alias was supposed to be Ring Lord instead, but the marketing team screwed him over. While he's not that great on fighting other sentient opponents on 1 v 1 combat, he proves to be an excellent beast/predator tamer, which is why he hasn't been "disqualified" yet. He has gained something of a cult following too.
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    • Here's the full plot for episode 3 (as always, changes are to be made according to your feedback).

      The episode starts by focusing on Astrapia. She is hovering in her cell and she thinks to herself how she feels cut out from the rest of the prisoners, because, while she is more than willing to fight for herself (scenes of her in the arena are shown here), she does not engage in needless violence (scenes of past prison fights are shown here). She laments on how it is a cruel world and she feels powerless to help. Her internal monologue is cut by a guard arriving and unlocking her cell, stating it is lunch time.

      Astrapia arrives in the lunch room, where various aliens are fighting over food. At this point, Fireborn and Rainox arrive and sit on a nearby table, where Vril is also sitting. This intrigues Astrapia, who sits a bit closer to them. The point of view changes to third person, with Fireborn, Rainox and Vril discussing (wondering, among other things, about the mysterious benefactor who brought the Crabdozer armor).

      Korisan "accidentally" bumps into Fireborn, knocking down his food tray. After exchanging snide remarks, they finally agree to settle this once and for all in a 1 v 1 match in the arena tomorrow moon.

      Fireborn is sparring with Stellar in the training room, wondering what's Korisan's problem. Stellar simply states that he's like that with everyone and that keeps most of himself a well hidden secret. Astrapia is secretly watching the sparring match and is intrigued by Fireborn, whose previous three-fight match (which she didn't watch btw) has made him somewhat of an infamy. At the same time, she thinks about not being able to "read" him properly (since Amperi are mind readers, a fact I recently remembered, because Ultra is a stupid robot). The sparring match is interrupted by a loud roar. Fireborn and Stellar rush toward the arena, where they see Mell-Kith taming a Tyrannopede. After having a short chat, they depart on friendly terms.

      The time for the match has arrived. Fireborn is wearing his brand new armor and both opponents have agreed to go unarmed, having this be a truly elemental battle. At first, things don't look good for Fireborn. Korisan keeps staying out of reach and dodging his attacks and is constantly forced on the defensive. The match is watched by the prisoners, including Astrapia this time, but also Tidas from his HQ. Fireborn, being desperate, has an epiphany: Remembering Mell-Keith's performance, he forms fire rings that surround a confused Korisan, which gives him enough time to lunge on him and start beating him down. A full-out brawl occurs, culminating in Fireborn and Korisan unleashing a powerful fire and ice blast, covering the arena in a thick fog. Korisan gets the drop on Fireborn, by sneak attacking then retreating inside the fog. Fireborn devises another plan: he randomly fires two fire disks, then waiting for Korisan to sneak attack him, shoots a powerful fire blast from his back scorching Korisan. However, Korisan had constructed long ice blades, which managed to pierce Fireborn. As a result, the two injured fighters agree on a draw.

      While Fireborn is met by Rainox and Stellar, who congratulate him, Astrapia once again watches from afar. Seeing that they treat each other with respect and even friendship, she approaches them and joins the gang, who accept her.

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    • your plans for the next few episodes seem decent, though I'm not sure why the prison is 'falling into chaos' in ep 4?

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    • The reason the prison falls into chaos is this: Sadocris is considered a high level threat and is therefore confined in a maximum security cell, guarded by robot guards (who are immune to her mind control power). A robot guard screws up and accidentally lets her free, after which, mayhem ensues. She starts capturing and mind controlling prisoners. However, this kind of mind control is not the obvious kind and they can still pretend they're normal, until it's too late. Increasing her reach inside the prison (figuratively and literally, as her bandages stretch across the entire complex like a twisted web) it all comes down to who you can trust. I think this is interesting, because when the friendly guard shows up, Fireborn will not be so trusting of him. Also, the trust between the main group will be tested. The relationship between Korisan and Fireborn will also develop, as they are forced to team up when surrounding by hordes of possessed prisoners (or ones that take advantage of the chaos to do their thing). The ep leans a bit on the horror side, but on the intense and keeping you alert kind of thriller.

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    • Y'know when I suggested that Thep Khufan could mind control people I meant one-at-a-time and only if the Thep Khufan places their head over the top of the victim's head. This sounds more like a Vladat invasion to me.

      Which would be interesting tbh, especially given your set up and plot.

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    • On second thought, it does make much more sense for it to be a Vladat invasion type of thing. So, with that in mind:

      Replacing the Thep Khufan with a Vladat. Her name could be Countess Vladeria, cousin of Lord Transyl. She was sent with troops on a scouting mission for "food sources" off the Anur System, but was intercepted in the nebula and their spaceship crash landed on Numeria. Almost all Vladats burned to death, the few that survived valiantly sacrificed themselves getting the Countess to safety, after which she was captured and imprisoned. Unfortunately for her, T'zun Army are not exactly very nutritious so she would have starved to death, where it not for other prisoners...A massive massacre occurred, known as the "Red Night" until Emperor Typhos (father of Tidas) himself defeated her and locked her up. The rest of the ep works pretty much the same.

      One small detail: The whole "can pretend to be normal" thing doesn't really work, unless one is short sighted and can't notice the Corruptura on the person's forehead. Which is why I propose this: The Corruptura dig themselves inside the person's forehead, but also cause them a severe aversion to sunlight, since exposure to it will still destroy the Corruptura.

      What do you think?

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    • I think you're talking about DIO's flesh buds.

      Countess Vladeria is a pretty bad name ngl. It's like someone called Lord Earthy or Queen Humian.

      Thinking about it, I'm not sure Corrupturas would work on T'zun army, but they could very much work on Erodinians and the Magma species. That being said, so long as it was night when she ermged from the wreck I imagine the Countess having no problem dealing with them

      This also begs the question of how old the Countess would be, and how long the Vladats have been (nearly) extinct for. Also how long Tidas has been ruling for. I don't really have an idea for how old T'zun Army can be, I guess they keep going until they run out of mental energy to sustain their form. It might also be worth discussing the Vladat wars/extinction on greater detail if need be. My headcanon for the extinction for the Vladats is this. Warning: it's a long read.

      I feel like we should keep the Thep Khufan (we don't need to keep the 'controlling people' power). Her 'pleasure' derived from hurting people by binding them and squeezing. Since you're such a nerd for Dragon Ball, you should recognise it as a reference to when Goku and Vegeta where inside the Big Gete Star after losing to the Meta-Coolers. She doesn't need to be a major character, she could just be a side character off-handedly seen or mentioned at one point. Like Rainox (while giving Fireborn some advice on the facility) says that she can be hell to deal with, but given that Fireborn is made of fire he might not have that problem.

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    • It was certainly an interesting read, quite insightful and pretty cool backstory.

      As for Countess Vladeria, that is just a title, not her real name. Unless you think Lord Transyl (which is just as bad as Lord Earthy then) is really a guy named Transyl. I believe he has that title since he used to rule Anur Transyl. Similarly, the Countess ruled a section of Anur Vladias called Vladeria. We can still change the name, though. (You may have noticed that naming things is not my forte and I would like to apologize for that).

      T'zun Army are definitely immune to Vladat mind control, which is why Typhos was able to defeat her. I think Tidas has been ruling for about 30 years.

      Keeping the Thep Khufan is fine by me (actually, I was a little sad that we had to replace her, but we worked that out). The question remains: Is the Countess the main villain of ep 4 or do they both appear? They could certainly offer a nice contrast between their methods of subduing people.

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    • Ultra3000 wrote:
      It was certainly an interesting read, quite insightful and pretty cool backstory.

      thanks mang

      I think the Countess would've lost her 'title' a long time ago tbh. Also I have yet to meet anyone who enjoys naming characters. A cheat I use for AoU is that unless the character has a specific name (like Ann and Dr. Albert), their name will usually be invented by picking a name that starts with the same first letter as the species of their unitrix. Kenny being a Kineceleran was a coincidence.

      The Countess should definitely be the main villain of episode 4. If the Thep Khufan had a prominent role in that episode, it would be as an ally to the heroes (even if only to beat the Vladat, much like Korisan). I like to think that the people of the Anur system hold bitter hatred for the Vladats (even in present day), and depending on the timeframe it is very possible she lived under Vladat rule before finding herself in the arena.

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    • I like the idea of Sadocris "allying" with the others on the principle that everyone of the Anur System hates Vladats (I think only someone as cruel and megalomaniac as Zs'Skayr could even admire them). On another note, having the Vladat referred to as simply "The Countess" works for me imo. But I also whipped up a new name for her: Vaeternia.

      So, to wrap that up, ep 4 has the Countess as the main villain and Sadocris is a supporting character. Most of the plot discussed above still stands.

      I think we need to work on the timeframe in order to avoid any continuity errors and such. Just noting, I believe that most of the species mentioned below have a quite long life span compared to a human's. So, without further ado:

      • The story takes place 30 years before Ben 10. Tidas has been ruling for 30 years also.
      • According to your headcanon and I'm pretty sure actual canon, Vladats have been extinct for quite a long time. I'll interpret this as being about 1,000 years. Now hold on, I'm gonna explain. The Countess was sent on the scouting mission just a few months before the mass Vladat extinction, narrowly missing it. The ship was lost for about 200 years after falling in a bad cosmic storm (the crew was in cryostasis this whole time). The ship eventually reached the T'zeen Nebula and was pulled towards Numeria, crash landing on it on 95 BT (Before Tritonius). For this to work, Typhos is retconned to being Tritonius' father instead of Tidas'. The latter events work pretty much the same. I should mention that the Countess was again sealed in cryostasis by Typhos, then buried deep beneath the ocean (where the prison foundations are today), since he had no way of knowing that sunlight hurts Vladats (the entire Red Night incident took place during one night, obviously).
      • Coming back to the present (well, 30 years before Ben 10, that is), let's see some other details:
        • Zs'Skayr has mysteriously disappeared after an expedition on Xenon with Myaxx.
        • Petrosapiens (and Sugilite) are still extinct and Tetrax has no reason appearing in this story. That means Petrosapiens can't appear (unless a really old Petrosapien, which seems plausible exists) but I would decide against it.
        • The Omnitrix is presumably still on Azmuth's vault on Galvan Prime (he has yet to leave for Xenon).
        • Malware was created just a couple of years ago. This detail is quite problematic, since Omniverse implies that Galvanic Mechamorphs were created much more recently than that.
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    • I am completely fine with reffering to the Vladat simply as 'The Countess'.

      I assumed Petropia was destroyed far closer to OS than that, though this detail in unimportant if we decide simply to ignore Petrosapiens and Crystalsapiens in this series.

      I'm pretty sure Azmuth spent most of his time creating the omnitrix on Xenon, where no one could steal it from him. The only people that knew about this were Albedo, Myaxx (and probably Zs'Skayr as a result), Xylene, and the Florauna that lived there. Again, I'm not so certain this detail is important thanks to the isolated nature of the planet.

      I like how you refer to changing who Tyhpos is as 'retconning'. At this stage there is no continuity, that's what we're building right now. 

      I don't think Omniverse actually gave a time frame for how old the Mechamorphs are. I think the best timeframe for their creation would be before Ascalon, so that Azmuth still feels guilty enough to want to make a positive impact and create the Omnitrix. Though I do believe it was implied that the Helix was deactivated recently. That can be changed for the sake of Earth-3210 tho. It has just occured to me that this Earth's designation is just counting down from 3.

      Speaking of which, maybe it would be worth creating an Earth-3210 timeline page on this wiki to better detail the important events of the universe that influence the series. Similar to my Earth-1010 page on BTFF, or CaT's Earth-83 timeline page.

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    • Something to consider about the city layout: I agree with your point that if the city is too submerged, protagonists wouldn't be able to visit it much, so the iceberg logic is not that apparent (expection being Tidas' HQ. After all, he wouldn't want the heroes to be able to venture there, right?). There is an increased amount of viaducts and such. But what about modes of transportation. Sure, many species can swim or fly, but most other require vehicles for quick transportation around the city. Any suggestions?

      Afaik, T'zun Army don't have a natural predator. Which leaves me asking: What lies under the great ocean? I kinda want the protagonists to fight a bunch of aquatic monsters/predators at one point. I vaguely remember Erodinians having a hippo-like predator, but not if it is amphibious as well.

      I'll probably make the Earth-3210 page later during the day, or tomorrow.

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    • Okay. Predators. The Erodinian predators have spent their entire lives for the past few hundred thousand years on a planet literally named after it's lack of rain and surface water. They cannot swim. T'zun Army are made entirely of water, so if they even had a predator it'd just be a species that consumes water, which isn't very helpful to the story here. We'd need to make unique predators for this planet, which isn't too hard to believe since this planet clearly has it's own ecosystem already. Maybe we could look at Subnautica for inspiration here.

      As for vehicles... how about a train network? Given the rather... elemental nature of the three main species, I don't think cars would work too well. Hover vehicles are also a bit cliche.

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    • Train network sounds good. Also, Subnautica seems like a pretty nice game (I actually think of getting it when it officially releases) and it gave me quite a few ideas:

      • Trypanocaris: Basically a scorpion/mantis shrimp hybrid. Healthy adult specimens reach 3.5 meters in length. It resides in small caverns, as such it is colored varying shades of brown and grey, with two bulging compound turquoise eyes. It has a large segmented tail, ending into two stingers, which administer a paralyzing toxin. It hunts solo, waiting near the entrance of the cavern, then snatching any unsuspecting prey that passes by with its powerful pincers, dragging in deep inside the cavern. It is a carnivore, but with a rather special diet: It uses its pincers to perform dorsal skinning on its prey, exposing the spinal bones, then sinks its drill-like mandibles (hence its name, which means "drill shrimp") into the bones, sucking their marrow.
      • Osteosarchos: A large, shark like predator. Healthy adult specimens reach 5-7 meters in length. It has several bone growths distributed along its body, some of them forming an external skeleton (not like an insect's exoskeleton, but like having a spine and ribs on the outside). Unlike modern whales, its fins have notable fingers, albeit webbed, ending in sharp claws. It has a short, but robust tail, able to catch up with the nimblest of prey. The bone growth is especially prominent on the head, forming crest-like structures, especially in males. It has a few large sharp teeth, two smaller rows of teeth inside its mouth and a long chameleon like tongue equipped with black barbs to snatch smaller prey. It displays cannibalistic tendencies, but also tends to hunt in groups of three.
      • SVP-10: Stands for Sentient Viral Pathogen. This is the species of Vaccine, an alien in Earth-32. SVP-10 are thought to originate from Hydrosia, Water Hazard's planet, were they have formed a symbiotic relationship of sorts with the Orishans. However, this claim is dubious, since incidents of SVP-10 appearing in other planets even before Orishans were made known to the wider universe are quite numerous. Whatever the case, SVP-10 require a liquid environment to properly thrive. They are semi-sentient: A few infected cells alone can barely function any differently from normal viruses, but once a super colony has formed, sentience begins to develop. SVP-10's mutation rate is exceedingly high: So much so that they can mimic diseases caused by other factors, like bacteria or fungi. At the same time, they can mimic the antibodies developed to fight them, as such they can act truly beneficially to a host organism. They are usually bonded to zooplankton and phytoplankton. Upon being eaten by larger organisms, they give them enhanced recovery rate from diseases or even infectious bites. That is, in the case the SVP-10 decide to be "friendly". Otherwise...infected organisms can be quite a scary sight.
      • Numeria's Bane: This beast blurs the line between reality and legend. This super apex predator is thought to have evolved close to a cluster of submarine volcanoes and its size rivals them. Its skin resembles volcanic rock, with a glowing lava red fin running down its back. Cracks on its skin cause lava like fluid to leak, though these are presumed to be wounds that never healed. It has six glowing yellow eyes, three on each side of its face. It has a somewhat elongated snout, with an enormous toothless mouth, its inside glowing lava red and able to spit lava in the form of streams or "fireball" style. Its very steps are thought to cause devastating tsunamis. Only one known specimen has ever been reported and it is widely attributed to the destruction of Lemunor's precursor around 300 BT. Since then, it is said to have entered a centuries-long sleep, with several tales warning of its inevitable return.

      Edit: If we are to keep Fireborn's backstory (not revealing this in full to avoid prying eyes), then curiosity about a possible well known aquatic alien species residing here could serve to bring back memory pieces.

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    • Those are some interesting species ideas. As well as the idea to have X species show up to jog Fireborn's memory. 

      I've decided upon the name of the Magma species. They're called Vesuviusapiens, and are from the planet Hephaestus. The species name is a reference to Mount Vesuvius, famous for destroying and burying Pompei in 79AD. The planet name is a reference to the Greek Goddess Chione of winter.

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    • Episode Titles:

      • Episode 1: Fire in the Hole
      • Episode 2: Trial by Fire
      • Episode 3: N/A
      • Episode 4: Sparking Interests
      • Episode 5: Blood in the Fire

      NEW Episode 1 scene:

      While Fireborn is escorted to the arena to prepare for his fights and such, he bumps into Astrapia, who was returning from her own performance in the arena. He tries to initiate a conversation, but Astrapia hurriedly hovers away. He makes another attempt, but she sends a warning lightning shot and she departs.

      Okay, I have figured out the basics of the prison layout:

      • Like I mentioned on above posts, the prison is located a few miles off the coast of Lemunor. The foundations have been built right above the Countess' containment unit. Due to multiple Trypanocaris making their caverns there, they are not as stable as they used to be and several marine biologists reject the option of having the colony established there exterminated, so this still remains an large issue.
      • The prison is divided into three large sectors: Sector 1 contains the entrance and half of the cellblocks (more on that below). Sector 2 contains the other half of the cellblocks, as well as the lunch room. Sector 3 contains the main office, surveillance rooms, med bay, entertainment room and is the part of the prison connected to the arena.
      • The prison is capable of holding 1,000 inmates at any given time. The size of the cells themselves vary, due to the size differences between the many alien species. For human-sized species or close enough, up to two inmates share a cell. For Gourmand-sized species, up to 5 inmates share a cell. For Galvan-sized species, up to 15-20 may share a cell. For Galilean-sized species, there is one inmate for every cell. According to these distinctions, there are four major cellblocks: I, II, III and IV. The first two are on Sector 1, the other two on Sector 2. Fireborn, Rainox, Vril, Astrapia, Korisan and Mell-Kith are all on Cellblock I. Stellar is on Cellblock III. There is another cellblock, V, reserved for extremely unstable and dangerous inmates, like Sadocris. This cellblock is on Sector 2. Keep in mind that the prison currently is somewhat empty: There are barely 500 prisoners, so many of the rules concerning the cell habitation are more relaxed.
      • Fireborn and Rainox are cellmates, Vril is alone on the opposite side, but five cells to the right, an unnamed Polymorph is three cells to their left. Astrapia and Korisan are on another row, but they don't share the same cell. (Korisan is with a Tropical Manzardill, Astrapia is alone).
      • There are about 100 staff members, ranging from Erodinians to Vesuviusapiens and robots. The warden is a T'zun Army.
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    • Forgot to add this: Numeria's Bane will remain part of the folklore. Many superstitious people will see Fireborn as Numeria's Bane's champion/herald, connecting this claim with the second interpretation of the main prophecy.

      Species Diet:

      • Pyronites require fuel to survive (carried over from Earth-1010 Pyronites). They don't actually have taste, so they're not exactly picky with their fuel choices (though Fireborn is especially fond of chunks of coal).
      • Necrofriggian's main delicacy is metal, whether solid or molten. Korisan prefers his metal half hot, half cold (best flavor this side of the Milky Way Galaxy, as he puts it).
      • Galvanic Mechamorphs' technorganic nature leaves them quite indifferent to organic nutrients. Their sustenance derives purely from a sun, effectively being solar batteries. The brighter the star, the better. Can also use devices like "sun guns" (from the OS episode "Ghostfreaked Out) to simulate sunlight in cases of emergency, but that's like taking vitamin pills instead of deriving it from food, so as a substitute it is quite lacking.
      • Amperi need only recharge themselves at regular intervals to sustain themselves.
      • Galileans are self-sustaining, being planets and all, though presumably they can eat almost anything. BTP also mentions on the Keplorr page that Galileans return to Keplorr's orbit from time to time to "Re-energize", which is obviously not possible for Stellar to accomplish.
      • T'zun Army only need to replenish their water mass to survive (taken directly from your notes, just posting it here to have a complete list).
      • I assume Vesuviusapiens require minerals and fuel like Pyronites.
      • Erodinians probably sustain themselves by absorbing mineral-rich sand.
      • Dactylidians require no sustenance whatsoever.
      • Tropical Manzardill are omnivores, can quickly recharge themselves by absorbing sunlight.
      • Cerebrocrustaceans can eat several smaller crustaceans, like barnacles or shrimp, fungi, worms, etc.
      • Polymorphs are scavengers, therefore they can digest whatever they happen to find.
      • Vladats feed on the life force of other beings (no, really, would never have guessed)
      • I'm a bit torn on Thep Khufans. They seem to be self sustaining, but who knows.

      On another note, while T'zun Army don't really need clothes, members of Tidas' Elite Guard and the authorities should have something to distinguish themselves from regular civilians. Any suggestions?

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    • I'd say armour for the T'zun army guards. Weapons would just go through them, but it can still cause the receiver to stumble a bit as their mass adjusts.

      Vesuviusapiens feed on minerals, yeah. "Their diet consists of minerals and fuels that help keep their internal heat and magma sustainable." to quote their species page.

      Erodinians don't eat sand. They use it to guard their organic innards. They need occaisional food and water to survive, but need very little and can go weeks without any. Being on a planet with abundant resources, the Erodinians here are physically stronger than most of their population. Similar to Bullfrag compared to other Incurseans.

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    • if you have time, can we meet on chat? I'd like to discuss the appearance of Fireborn. We definitely discussed this before but I can't remember what we decided on.

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    • Alright, we have a Logo courtesy of the almighty feline
      BlazeofGloryLogo
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    • Ultra, it's been nearly two weeks, are you still there?

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    • Yup, still here. Been busy irl (have to take two exams this week, which were quite unexpected), so sorry for suddenly disappearing. I will resume regular activity next week. So, while I'll be unable to chat for the time being, I can still find time to answer thread messages.

      Made the series page, which is still quite short, but it's a start. Honestly, most of the stuff discussed go to the separate Numeria and Earth-3210 pages which will be made soon.

      I also came up with a suggestion concerning a major plot point: How are species from around the u inverse found on Numeria? I believe we agreed on the cause being cosmic storms, but I'd like to expand on that idea. (It's not To'kustars)

      Enter the Nepholeen. They are Cloud 10's species, an as of yet unrevealed alien of mine, who I actually made way back. In short, Nepholeen are gaseous life forms, residing on various nebulae (their actual place of origin is unknown). They have the ability to control the weather, usually on a cosmic scale: Cosmic storms, solar winds, meteor showers, that kinda stuff. They are quite detached, as their consciousness spreads all over the nebula, they essentially become the nebula. They have a limited hive mind mentality going on as well. Hence, they have a "blue and orange" morality, if you are familiar with the term. If a member is separated from the rest, it will begin developing individuality to a degree. If stranded on a planet, their powers become severely limited, able to "only" cause weather phenomena native on the planet on a radius of about 5 miles maximum.

      So, what do you think? Once again, I apologize for not leaving a message explaining my situation, but better late than never, I suppose. Talk to you soon mang.

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    • We'd established Numeria was located inside the T'zeen Nebula, which is already a very dangerous environment because it's a floating ocean. Not many ships that enter ever escape. I thought the reasoning we were going with was that any ship that goes in, or sometimes just near, the Nebula gets dragged in by either the T'zun army or some other force of the Percipi Proximity.

      Which reminds me I forgot to say (the thread was buggy when I tried last). I named the alliance between the three races the 'Precipi Proximity'. Do you think the name suits or should we change it up for Earth-3210?

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    • should I make us a private wiki for BoG? It'll help us set everything up without it being seen by the people that browse here.

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    • A month later, I'm hoping you see this but my offer still stands

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    • A private wiki sounds like a good idea.

      Precipi Proximity is a nice name for the alliance, so I'd like to keep that (after all, who am I to ruin such wondrous alliteration).

      Also, I saw the Tropiguana page, you did a great job.

      Congrats on being Content Mod, you definitely deserve it.

      Alright, so you may be wondering where the hell I've been. Thing is, this is my last year in high school and exams are less than a month away, so I've set that as my top priority over BTFF. They're gonna last until the middle of June, so not much I can do right now.

      I'm sorry I didn't inform you about that sooner. I wish I had balanced my schedule better, but I didn't. I hope you understand.

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    • A FANDOM user
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